Being Secure

We need to start using the phrase “For reasons of National Security…” a lot more.

It’s a useful phrase in any context that you’re trying to get someone to do something they don’t want to. If it’s supposed to be an unassailable argument when it’s emitted by the lips of a high muckity-muck or a burrowcrat, then why can’t the vanilla populace use it?

“For reasons of National Security, I’m going to have to ask you to open your wallet and give me all of your cash and credit cards.” [Mugger]

“For reasons of National Security, don’t park your Hummer in the handicapped slot.” [What a bozo]

“I’m returning this unwanted Christmas gift for reasons of National Security.”

“I can’t come into work today, for reasons of National Security.”

“Son, brush your teeth …”

This could be as big as the nauseating “I would tell you but I’d have to kill you” comeback of the late 90s. Because (let’s face it), most of the time this phrase is uttered, it’s a screen that hides incompetence or lies.

Can you imagine a whole room of people laughing the next time someone tries to say this in a White House briefing?